940 AM

Long have I thought that maybe one day I’ll learn to forget. Or the pain would be any less. I try and occupy myself with anything, anything at all. It does work.. momentarily I guess. But then as I break the tension and go for the coffee room.. it just all comes back to me in a flush. Yet, the pain of loss isn’t great at the moment. It gets worse when I light up my cigarette and start sipping the hot coffee.

Sometimes I talk to myself, in a low tone of voice. I like to hear myself speaking to you. It calms me down when I start to imagine you listening. I know how much you liked my “hayel” accent. Sometimes the words I speak are random and other times they’re just a pathetic word rhyming that make no sense even as they’re coming out.

The truth is, I never got over you no matter how hard I tried. Perhaps there still is a little part of me that cant believe you’ve gone, perhaps I’m just too afraid to move on. But one thing I am sure of. I wont ever find another you.